I'M BAAAAACCCCKKKK!!!!

So I know I have been MIA...there's no excuse! Anyway, I'd like to take a little trip down memory lane and talk a bit about the times in my life where I went off the rails. Those specific food addictions that added a pound or five to my frame. I don't know if we all do this but I can remember each milestone weight from 145 to 150 to 157 to 162 to 168 and so on. Why oh WHY didn't I stop at 168. Anyway, no use crying over spilled milk. Here goes nothing.

There was the grilled ham and cheese and $.99 bag of Sour Cream and Cheddar Chips phase. Add to that a bottle of Vess Strawberry soda every two days and the six or seven pounds I gained during that time are easy to explain!

Then there was the Cap'n Crunch phase which I went through after I discovered Silk. After years of lactose intolerance and a cereal depravity, I went a little overboard with the cereal. I'm talking Cap'n Crunch for breakfast lunch and dinner. That was another, maybe five pounds. Five pounds from cereal? YES!! I ate several large bowls a day. It was a hot mess!

Then there was the tun fish debacle. Now, I know what you're thinking, 'tuna doesn't sound so bad.' Right! Well, when you make it the way I make it it is absolutely AWFUL for you. I'm talking, mayo, mustard, boiled eggs, pickles, and a mountain of sugar mixed together and eaten with Ritz crackers. What a clusterfuck!

Then there was the Oreo McFlurry, Oreo Sonic Blast, Mint Oreo Blizzard, and Ben & Jerry's craze of the mid to late 2000's and it's no wonder that I have ballooned up from a healthy and svelte 145 pounds to a not so svelte, and really quite unappealing...let's not mention it!

The last five pounds can be attributed to a Kitkat phase and a very serious case of depression but I digress. I should mention here that there were other phases in between, DiGiorno pizza phase, the $.99 bag of Chesters's Hot Fries everyday after school in HS, the Dorito's, Coke, and Hostess cupcake phase of my Econ days Sophomore year of college, there was the Pillsbury Bake Chocolate Chip cookie and Eddy's Butter Pecan ice cream mixed phase. The list goes on.

Either way, I am geting back to Insanity today after almost a month of no workouts and I am excited and nervous. Excited because I have a very cute, very tight, bandage dress that needs to be worn for my sisters 30th birthday bash. Also because in exactly one month I am embarking on my fourth annual trip to Niobrara. SO STOKED!! Either way, it's salads, oatmeal, baked chicken, and lots of veggies until then and hopefully after!

I'm at Roscoe's...this is bad. In my defense, I haven't eaten anything but oatmeal ALL DAY LONG. I have starved myself so that I could partake in the amazingness that is Roscoe's without feeling unbearable guilt afterwards. I'm so excited!

THIS WEEK IS CRUCIAL...

So, at this point, I have reached a rather important milestone for my Insanity workouts. Two milestones, actually.

First, I usually give up on Insanity at the end of week two, but on one of my more aggressive bouts with Insanity, I persisted until the fourth day of the third week. So, here I am, embarking on my third week of Insanity, for only the second time in my life, and I am three days in. God has sent me a little challenge to see just how serious I am about this.

Today, my Omaha family is in town for a visit which makes it uber tempting to ditch my workouts until they leave and hang out with them. It would be logical, it would be understandable, it would even be permissible in certain circumstances. BUT, given my history with Insanity and the point that I am at now, I feel like it would be ill-advised. I'm serious this time. So, I went to their hotel when I got off work, said hi, and came home and did my workout. I have now completed the third day of the third week and I am so proud of myself.

I know it probably seems ridiculous to even put this much thought into it but the thing is, I know myself and it is so easy for me to fall off the wagon! If I skip even one scheduled workout, it could likely throw me off of my routine completely and just as quickly as I've progressed, I'll be back at square one. I have about 80 days until Niobrara and if I want to have a flat tummy I know one thing is certain...I GOTTA WORK!! Until next time!

INSANITY UPDATE!!! DAY 14

Day 1 Day 14

So today marks day 14 of my Insanity workout and I have quite a bit to report.

Not a total Betty but a vast improvement! Who knows that quote??

I only uploaded front facing images because there was a flash debacle and an unsightly pudge post breakfast that did not accurately depict the progress I've made:) Besides, the most noticeable difference is in my stomach.

First things, first! After two weeks of working out consistently, I finally feel like it is becoming a part of my routine. I actually enjoy the workouts and in a weird way, I look forward to them. That's the first time I have ever been able to say that. I can also feel major differences in myself. For starters, my clothes fit a little better these days and I have a lot more energy. Which is good cause I need every ounce of extra energy to get through any of the Insanity workouts. They're all still a major challenge but I find that I can get through the entire warm-up without stopping and the first circuit of every workout. For those of you who haven't see an Insanity DVD, there are 6 circuits (meaning groups of exercise) on each DVD. One circuit consists of 4 different exercises each last 30 seconds. Three of the four are high impact, high cardio and one is a recovery. After you complete a circuit you rest for 30 seconds and then repeat it. I think at some point this week I'll upload a video so you guys can see how Insanity is done!

Anyway, I have a few setbacks to report with the triumphs. Recently, I got into the habit of getting on the scale every single morning to track my weight loss. Anyone who has ever tried to lose an inch knows that this is a tremendously bad idea. I mean, TERRIBLE. Anyway, after I reported my big weight loss last week I got back on the scale Sunday morning and was back up five pounds. DEVASTATION!!! I actually cried a little to Wes about. He immediately explained to me that this happens to me every time I am about to start my period (TMI?) and that I shouldn't fret. So, what did I do? I FRETTED. BIG TIME. This is the last time I will ever mention what happened on Monday.

Grandma's Double Chocolate Cookies

Bagel w/butter and strawberry jam

Sprite
Nutter Butter
Several handfuls of almonds
Kettle Baked Chips
Several sticks of Almond and Dark Chocolate Biscotti

I mean, I was in full on "fuck it" mode. My logic? 'Well, I may as well eat what I want if I'm gonna just balloon up to my regular weight anyway!' This was such an epic fail I cringe even thinking about it. Anyway, I came home and told Wes about it cause I felt guilty about it. Obviously! He agreed that my behavior was ridiculous, though I should note that I refused to tell him what I actually ate (he's probably shaking his head right now) because I didn't want to see that look he gives me when I act like a kitchen raider at fat camp. And for the record, the KitKat didn't happen. TRUST ME! I thought about it. Ultimately though, I decided against it. Here's the ridiculous thing. To me, the KitKat would have been taking it tooooo far which is the equivalent of shaving your head completely bald and leaving a small patch of curls on the left side in the back and when people ask you why you left that bit of hair on you say 'Well, I didn't want to look ridiculous.' Yea, I'm absurd, I know. Don't judge me! So that was Monday.

Tuesday was better as was every other day this week. I managed to exercise six days in a row and maintain a relatively healthy diet. I have been eating at least 2 clementines a day for snack and eating an apple in the afternoon for energy instead of green tea and like I said, I feel really really good!

I have to say this, and Wes is gonna have a little mental freak out for what I am about to say but it needs to be said. Wes, I know how much you hate being acknowledged publicly, and though you're probably reading this alone, it'll make you uncomfortable anyway. Stop reading now :)

Wes has been absolutely AMAZING throughout this entire process. I mean, I don't ,know how many times I have cried or gotten frustrated or irritated and he just talks me through it and encourages me every single time. This week though, he took it to a new level. As you guys remember, he agreed to workout with me a few days a week. Well, he has been and having someone there to do it with me really encourages me to go further and push myself harder so I am so grateful. The thing that kind of blows me away though, and it shouldn't cause Wes is always such a sweetheart to me, is that he gets up in the morning and cooks my lunch for me so I don't have to worry about it. Egg whites and turkey bacon is what I've been eating every day this week cause it's what he eats. But he usually doesn't get up until after I am gone and everyday this week, he has gotten out of bed to cook for me so I can stick to my diet at work. 'And the best boyfriend of the year award goes to...WES TAYLOR!!!!!!!!' I love him and am so thankful that I've been so blessed. Enough of the sap fest though.

We have a date with Sean T's crazy self in about 3o minutes so I'm gonna get going. Thanks for reading, I know this was dissertation speed. Talk soon!

**No way I am proofreading this!

I WILL NEVER SMOKE AGAIN!

After 26 years and countless hours of self-reflection, I know a few things about myself. Like? You ask...

Like...
If, by some unfortunate decision I decide to be adventurous and take the trash out and there is trash can juice on the can, I might have a panic attack.

Like...
If I don't tie my hair down with a head scarf before Insanity, I may as well pack it in for the night cause I'm gonna look like Diana Ross (circa the Supreme days, though she stay with a fat fro) after a concert at an air-conditionless Apollo Theater in the middle of a heat wave in NYC.

Like...
I can bullshit my way through any Marketing project the day before it is due and still get a good grade because Marketing is second nature to me. (A toot of the horn? Why don't mind if I do.)

With that in mind, it doesn't take me long to learn new things about myself and store them away in my mental Rolodex. So, you ask, what have we stored in the mental Rolodex this week. I am NOT smoker.

Last night, I went out with my girls to a Hookah bar in Westwood and we had a total blast. I mean, I really great time. But here's the thing, within the first 45 seconds of my Insanity workout today, (Cardio Power and Resistance) I knew I was in serious trouble. My breath was short, my legs and arms felt like burlap sacks, holding my core tight was like trying to hold my breath altogether. I mean it was a total clusterfuck. (Excuse my language) I had to rewind the DVD several times because I realized I was watching more than I was exercising which is an epic fail. I was gasping for air like I had been water-boarded. All in all, I finished the workout but not without a gargantuan effort on my part and only because of sheer determination not be beaten by a freaking hookah. I will NE-VER smoke again!

I LOST WEIGHT!!!!!

I am proud to say that after a week of SUPER hard work doing Insanity, I LOST 6.4lbs!!!!!

Excited is an understatement! Here's the thing: I'm supposed to do the Cardio Recovery today but I am so empowered by this weight loss that I want to do Cardio Power and Resistance or Plyometric Cardio, you know. Something to really get my blood pumping. Something that will spur this whole thing along, you know!! We'll see! I'm going to post two week photos next week!

QUICK NOTE!

I just youtubed some Insanity videos and found a ton of people's before and after looks. I am really excited! I'm on day three which means I'm not too far in to start a little video blog. We'll see how this goes. I'll try to have one up by the weekend as well as a weight update! It's definitely good news though. I have certainly dropped some poundage!